Skip to content

The Girl Next Whore

05/25/2010

Quick Thoughts on Ali’s season of the Bachelorette:

  • Why am I watching this?  Oh, yeah. I’m a reality whore.
  • Ali Fedotowsky sounds more like an NHL defense-man than a bachelorette.
  • Ali suddenly looks a lot like her arch nemesis, Vienna, with her bleached, exteneded hair, her “tanning tips from Snooki” (my wife’s line), and a few extra lbs.  Someone mentioned that she looks like she got a boob job; I guess six months in L.A. on shooting prep will do that too a girl’s esteem?  Perhaps, but it looks like she’s been comforting herself with the craft services  judging from her bulging arm in her sleeveless dress… I know: MEAN.

    "Before"

  • "After"

    "TheWhore"

  • Someone wrote on my Facebook post “Is that the best America can do?”  Well half the dudes are Canadian, so I guess U.S.A. ran out of single dudes without dignity?
  • The dudes on the show are as catty as the women.  Disgusting.  They voted the “Entertainment Wrestler” Justin as the guy who was here for the wrong reasons.  Of course, that meant he got a rose.  Have they ever watched a season?  Duh.

  • The only NAS (non anglo-saxon) in the group, Roberto, is the clear front runner.  Ali almost bedded the dude when he got out of the limo.  It’s your fairy-“tail” (sic) to lose, muchacho.
  • By and large, she looks like she’s made good decisions thus far, save the two Craigs that made the final 17.

The Craig with the poofy hair is a dink, the other Craig went tattling on the other dudes on episode one.  Grow a pair.

  • This Dude, “Shooter,” thought it would be a good idea to tell Ali that his nickname originated from his premature nature… I’m not talking about birth here people.  Ali wisely refrained.

  • This dude admitted that he wouldn’t have picked himself either… nice.  Lack of self-confidence is sexy to chicks.  He’s back to daddy’s law firm.

  • This guy is an outdoors-man.  He’s got 10s of hunting trophys all over his walls, and he still lives on his daddy’s ranch.  Ali worked for FaceBook dude… I don’t think she’s ready to unplug and go all “Call of the Wild” with you.

So, I guess I’m looking forward to the season.  It will be fun to see the bacheloreette go from “The Girl Next Door” to, well… you read the title.  She does seem to have a good head on her shoulders, even if she has ruined it with peroxide and a weave.

Advertisements
7 Comments leave one →
  1. Jenelyn Russo permalink
    05/25/2010 7:11 am

    Wonderful morning humor. That episode last night was one big mess. Can’t wait to see the rest of the season–alongside your commentary, of course! And way to throw the hockey reference in there! Awesome!

  2. 05/25/2010 8:47 am

    Haha. She wishes she were in the NHL. The men are much more handsome 🙂

  3. Adrienne permalink
    05/25/2010 9:48 am

    Craig with the “poofy hair” has a resemblance to the “McDreamy” character played by Patrick Dempsey!! I think I’ll refer to him as McDinky with your permission? And yes….the ViennaWeave is disheartening =(

  4. Carolyn permalink
    05/25/2010 5:00 pm

    I too have been captured and swept up into the abnormal fixation of reality shows.
    But only a couple of times. I am surprised that you have ever watched this show.!

    • 05/25/2010 5:04 pm

      What can I say…. I’m a “renaissance man!” I can wax equally on Lakers and love.

Trackbacks

  1. Man Card, Revoked « The Bush Report
  2. Nailed it! « The Bush Report

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: